Don’t Take It Personally

How did the holidays go for your business and your front line?  Chances are, you had your challenges with difficult customers. When a guest or customer is angry, or even rude, it can be difficult to NOT take things personally.  Today ‘we’re going to talk about why and how you can stop allowing that to happen to you when dealing with humans.

There are a number of reasons a guest is rude to you, or treats you poorly as a fellow human. Perhaps they have even questioned yours, or your company’s ability to take care of them. When this happens, remember a few important things.

Chances are, you, or your front line do not know this person beyond the customer relationship that has  been established. Why would you take something personally from someone who you do not even know? If it’s a friend, family member, or acquaintance, it’s one thing. I can understand taking something personally from them. But it’s not. It’s a guy named Frank from Waukeegan, and he is not happy with something so he’s yelling at you, not because he does not like you, but because you represent the organization he has some sort of beef with.  He is yelling at the logo on your name tag, not you.

Please do not think I am defending poor behavior, but when a customer gets mad at you for properly performing your job, they are not mad at you. Their mad at their next door neighbors barking dog. They are mad at their huge phone bill. They are mad their bossy supervisor at work, or annoyed at their in-laws.  Maybe even mad at themselves, and they direct this negative energy towards you. But there is no need to take it personally or get defensive. As long as you are kind, and communicate to the best of your ability, you have NOTHING to take personally.

Now if the guest or customer lashes out at you personally, perhaps making an unkind comment about your appearance, performance, or something personal, before you do what most humans would and react, remind yourself that this is about them, and not you. You don’t know them. Why on earth would you take anything personally from a stranger?

As difficult as it may be to remind yourself that compassion is EXACTLY what this angry customer needs right now, that is precisely what you should give them. I will, however, say it again. There is a point of bad behavior where something other than compassion, like police or a manager, is necessary. Until this point, though, realize you are still in control and can give the customer or guest what they need, and move on with your day. 

I truly believe that regardless of the emotions of that difficult customer, they will remember how you treated them, even if only on a subconscious level. They will come back, and they may even surprise you with their behavior on their next visit.

You will find out very soon, that I am a big optimist. I believe in the best in people, and all of us who deal with human for a living can set the bar for how we all treat each other everywhere, all the time.

I can dream, can’t I? So can all of you.

Carry on.